Global (Dress) Gathering

So, I know I'm a couple of days behind with this but I'm blaming being momentarily dumb-struck by the apparent lack of talent you need to be a stylist these days. Obviously not in all cases but to say I gasped in horror at quite a number of this years Golden Globes dresses I'd say there's a few people who need their P45 form handed to them..and the sooner the better.

I've read the reports, I've studied the pictures and I've watched the reviews but I just don't entirely agree with the dresses being praised and those being blacklisted.

So here I am, throwing my take on it all into the mix. You might disagree, and if you do please tell me. I love to listen to all opinions when it comes to fashion (not so much regarding tea..it's Earl Grey or no way!)

Firstly I'll line up the dresses I just could not forgive. And whatever reason they had for them isn't good enough. I'm talking to you Sarah Michelle "my daughter picked it" Gellar - your CHILD picked your Golden Globes Dress? Are you insane?!

• Rooney Mara (Nina Ricci) - I expected more from the girl who's set alight so many red carpets of late. I just feel this dress is too safe and a little boring if I'm honest.
• Naya Rivera (Vera Wang) - Whoever stitched that puckered seam needs sacked. That's the kind of thing I used to do in 1st year at university. And then immediately unpicked and restitched. Poor show.
• Michelle Williams (Jason Wu) - She's so beautiful, I just felt this was like a heavy curtain on her.
• Amanda Peet (Marc Jacobs) - This is just too much volume for a woman with such a lovely figure underneath. She looks as if she should be covering a loo roll!
• Lady Victoria Hervey (unsure) - Not sure she got the memo but ladies certainly don't dress that way.
• Emma Stone (Lanvin) - Wrong side of quirky; nobody needs an eagle on their belt at the Globes. Or ever.
• Livia Giuggioli Firth (Armani) - Disappointing from the woman who made the effort she did for The Kings Speech premiere
• Erin Wasson (who knows or cares) - I just. I can't.
• Cameron Diaz (Monique Lhuillier) - I so wanted to approve but I just think this wasn't a figure flatterer. She has an amazing body but this just doesn't show it off well.
• Charlize Theron (Dior) - Undeniably stunning but I think the dress is too fussy and that mixed hemline is no winner.
• Salma Hayek (Gucci) - This has had rave reviews but I feel it fitted badly, was too fussy and didn't compliment her stunning figure enough.
• Wendi McLendon-Covey (unsure) - No. Just no.
• Angelina Jolie (Atelier Versace) - Again, this had great reviews but I think it's blah. Team Aniston.
• Sarah Michelle Gellar (Monique Lhuillier) - I think you already know my thoughts here.

Moans over here are my winners:

• Reese Witherspoon (Zac Posen) - I've long been a fan of this actress and I think she looks absolutely breathtaking in this dress. Her casual hair suits the look down to the ground.
• Guiliana Rancic (Basil Soda) - Guiliana continues to be an inspiration not only in her personal life but her fashion life too. Could not have more love for this woman if I tried.
• Nicole Richie (Julien Macdonald) - I love the colour, the fit, the way she's accessorised it. In my eyes Nicole rarely puts a fashion foot wrong.
• Julianne Moore (Chanel) - Absolutely rocking this seasons peplum trend proving it's not just for twenty-somethings.
• Lea Michele (Marchesa) - This dress received some negative feedback from critics but I think Lea looks great and proves she can wear, and look knock out, in more than just Oscar De La Renta (her usual choice)
• Kate Winslet (Jenny Packham) - Lately Kate has been seen time and time again in black and white dresses and looking fantastic. Why break the trend?
• Paula Patton (Monique Lhuillier) - Monique's design team needed to get back on my good side after having two dummy dresses (in my opinion) and they've done it well this this stunner in the seasons new on trend colour. Well played.
• Helen Mirren (Badgley Mischka) - All women over the age of 50 should look to Helen for style direction. Classy and cool.
• Kelly Osbourne (Zac Posen) - Again Zac's pulled it out the bag. Kelly's received some stick for this look but I think she's pulled off the dress perfectly. And I think only someone with her rock'n'roll personality could do it so well.
• Claire Danes (J.Mendel) - Another monochrome stunner. She just looks so lovely.
• Heidi Klum (Calvin Klein) - I love the dress, I love the necklace, I love the woman. I am in love with this look.
• Diane Agron (Giles) - Another girl who received some black marks against her fashion resume for this dress but I couldn't disagree more. Anyone who has the guts to wear a dress like this and pull it off gets props from me.
• Madonna (Reem Acra) - Can't stand her. Can't stop looking at this dress. Looking fantastic.
• Jessica Beil (Elie Saab) - Jessica's another who received mixed reviews but I think she looks classy and elegant and this dress is absolutely stunning so well done Elie too.
• Sofia Vergara (Vera Wang) - I fell in love with her when I saw her in New Years Eve, what a comedy legend. But there's nothing funny about this dress. Ultra sexy. I'd get married in this bad boy!
• Jessica Alba (Gucci) - I need no more reason to be in love with this woman. But if I did this dress would seal the deal. Besotted.

However, three dresses really stood out for me and for at least two of them I've read bad reviews. Couldn't disagree more.

Cue my top three:

• Zooey Deschanel (Prada) - My It Girl of the moment and she hasn't disappointed. She looks incredible and her laid back hair and makeup compliment the dress perfectly. And did I mention it's a one off? Oh yes. Designed specifically for her. Jealous.
• Piper Perabo (Theyskens Theory) - I am an advocate of volume; in my hair, in my music and most definitely in my dresses. This structured beauty from Theyskens Theory hasn't let me down.
• Natalie Portman (Lanvin) - A label I've admired for as long as I can remember and an actress I adore. It puts my in mind of the dress Carrie was given by Alexander Petrovsky in Season 6 of SATC.  Portman and Lanvin: a match made in (fashion) heaven.

And with that I am done awarding and berating the stars and their stylists. Have a good evening.